I don't get it

Here's a few things I don't get, popularity-wise:

MUSIC

Radiohead: God, they're boring! Boring, boring, boring!! I listen to all these people saying, "They're geniuses!" and I just wonder, What the hell are you listening to? Because I fell asleep halfway through the song. Which song? Any of them. But especially "Karma Police." That's more sleep-inducing than two bottles of Nyquil. See also: Modest Mouse.

TV

American Idol: Why does everyone in America watch this travesty? "I just watch it to make fun of it." LIAR!! I know you love it. I just don't know why. "We are unsatisfied with your personal preferences in musical stardom. We will tell you who to worship." "Yes, masters. Clay Aiken is a delightful pixie, and not at all a disturbing, charmless little freak."

ER and West Wing: They're done, people. Let them die.

The Simple Life: And Paris Hilton, in general. In fact, this whole "rich girl" trend. Why we should elevate, as David Cross so memorably calls them, "these rich, giggling, country western singers" (only he didn't say "ry western singer") to icon status just boggles my mind. They deserve nothing but scorn and loathing, and yet our culture celebrates and rewards them. There is very little in pop culture that makes me think, maybe we'd be better off without pop culture in its entirety (this is a pop culture blog, after all), but Paris Hilton and her ilk are right up there.

BOOKS

The Da Vinci Code: Now, I haven't read the book, so this is somewhat uninformed. But if I can't make uninformed snap judgments, why should I even have a blog? So I've paged through this thing at the store a couple times, and it looks like a decent enough mystery/thriller, but this is ridiculous. You know what I think? I think this is a book that makes people think they're smart for reading it -- the kind of smart that doesn't hurt your head, or require much actual thinking at all. And I think it's a book people feel required to read specifically because of its massive popularity, not because of any desire they have to crack a good book. It's got just enough historical and religious mumbo-jumbo in it to make people praise it far beyond its basic mystery/thriller worth. I don't fault the people who say, "Yeah, it was a fun read." But anyone who says, "This is the best book I've ever read," probably hasn't read a book since The Bridges of Madison County.

MOVIES

My Big Fat Boring Stupid Unfunny Greek Wedding: Well, the title pretty much sums it up. I've bitched about this movie before, but I'll say it again: literally the only time I laughed during the entire film is at the wedding, when the mother of the groom asks, "What are they saying?" and the father of the groom says, "I don't know -- it's all Greek to me!" That lame, corny old joke sparkled like a gem in the midst of the other sub-sitcom level "humor". I didn't find any of her family to be wacky or impish or adorable -- I found them boring at best, irritating as hell at worst. Nia Vardalos is not cute or charming. She's a bug-eyed ham, with absolutely no charisma. I hate this movie.

TV: Emmy Nominations

A few of my takes on the 2004 Emmy nominations:

--Biggest oversight is Michael Chiklis for The Shield. I think it's the best show on television, and he's the best thing about it. I mean, how unfair is it that he gets dropped from last year's list, but Kiefer Sutherland remains? This is just an example of how, when something finally breaks into the awareness of the Emmy voters, it takes a miracle to dislodge it -- apparently, none of them realized 24 became a parody of itself this year (as if it weren't already one last year), just as none of them are willing to admit The West Wing's best days are way behind it now. But The Shield, despite Chiklis's surprising Emmy win in its first season, has never fully penetrated the Emmy voters' groupthink, probably because it's on a non-broadcast network that isn't HBO.

--Also, I'm grateful to see Arrested Development got the attention it deserved, but disappointed that Scrubs continues to be slighted (despite best editing and best writing noms this year). No John C. McGinley as supporting actor? That's just wrong.

--Sex and the City's popularity continues to baffle me, but at least this is the last year it can hog all those nominations. And good riddance to it. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: HBO actually managed to create a show so bad that no amount of gratuitous nudity could make me watch it. And don't tell me it's because it's meant for women, and I just don't understand it. I understand a piece of crap when I see it. All those women read Bridges of Madison County, too -- doesn't mean it wasn't still a big steaming pile of horse crap.

--Matt LeBlanc: enjoy your acting nomination. It'll be your last.

--Joan of Arcadia's entry in the best drama category is a bit of a surprise, but maybe it shouldn't be. Emmy voters love that God fella! And Amber Tamblyn's nomination for best actress is amazing (but well-deserved), considering her -- and the show's -- youth.

--On the other hand -- Mariska Hargitay, for Law & Order: One of Those Damn Spin-Offs? Really? Are there that few deserving actresses working in TV these days?

--I wish I still had HBO. Sounds like I'm missing a lot of good stuff. I hope Deadwood comes out on DVD soon.

--Emmy voters, you've given an award to all four Will & Grace actors. You can stop nominating them now. Actually, you should've stopped before Debra Messing won. What was that all about??

--Even sadder than a nomination coming after a show's cancellation -- as with Bonnie Hunt (whom I love), or Futurama -- is a nomination coming after an actor's cancellation. Which is my morbid way of saying, I loved John Ritter and all, but giving him an Emmy nomination he didn't deserve isn't going to make anyone feel any better.

--I find a bitter kind of satisfaction in the fact that after all the hoopla over their respective finales, neither Friends nor Frasier were nominated as best comedy. If only I could say the same about that damn Sex and the City.