COMICS: Wed. 7/28/04

Avengers: As a long-time non Avengers fan, I don't even know what to make of this. I'm totally buying it only because Bendis is writing it. Okay, before anything else, I have to say, TWO double-page spreads of the Avengers Mansion blowing up seems excessive. I barely know most of these characters, but Bendis does a decent job of giving them personalities before the shit starts to fly; the Hawkman/Madame Hydra bit is funny and believable, and got an extra kick from his turning it around on She-Hulk (even though I know from her own comic that she doesn't even live in Avengers Mansion anymore... details, details). So, Ant-Man's dead. Moment of silence, please (in which I try to remember who the hell Ant-Man is. I thought Hank Pym was Ant-Man. Who's this guy? Was he the guy dating Jessica a year ago in Alias?). And the Vision crashes into the Mansion, melts like the Wicked Witch of the West, and coughs up Ultron hairballs. Cool.

All that's interesting enough, but it's the personality changes in other characters that really intrigues me. What is making Tony Stark feel like he's drunk? What is driving She-Hulk berserk (and causing her to rip the Vision in half and pummel Captain America senseless -- which, as bad as the situation is, was still completely badass)? This issue has gotten me hooked. I'll stick around for more of this Disassembled nonsense, even though I hate crossovers and don't really care about the Avengers. By which I mean, I'll stick around for the books written by the good writers, like Bendis and Kirkman. (Assuming Kirkman's next issue of Captain America is better than his first.)

Powers: Am I supposed to remember who this new girl who's dressing up as Retro Girl is? Cause I don't. Is this a character that was introduced ages ago, or is she brand new, and I shouldn't feel bad about not recognizing her? Second issue of the reboot wasn't as excellent as the first; Oeming's art looks rushed in places, and Bendis draws out the interrogation scenes a little too long (Bendis padding a story? Shocking!). But it's still a good issue.

The Walking Dead: The new artist is starting to bug me. Tony Moore was so excellent at creating detailed, individual characters; with Charlie Adlard, I can hardly tell one character from another. Which bearded man is this? And Kirkman's foreshadowing was a little blunt: Carol is suddenly content, and accepting of things she had so recently condemned; I'm sure she's going to live a nice, long, happy life. As long as a zombie doesn't eat her face... oh, DAMN!! Didn't see that coming!!

Fantastic Four: This storyline had potential in the beginning, but I was disappointed with this finale. First of all, strange as it may be to say it, what with my constant criticism of the padding of Marvel arcs out to unnecessary lengths: this issue felt rushed and crowded; it might have been better with one more issue to wrap things up. Then again, that might only have added one more unenjoyable issue to the story. Waid seemed to lose his control of the villain characters; instead of the interesting individuals they started out as, they fell back into corny villain cliches at the end. I stopped caring about Cole and stopped believing in her mini-romance with Johnny. Glad there's a new story next issue.

Astonishing X-Men: Last week, it took me forever to remember one of the comics I had bought. Same thing this week, and this was the comic. Still not astonished by it. The art, yes; the art is gorgeous. But the writing... I want to like it, because it's Whedon, but I just don't. The conflict in this issue is especially contrived: I didn't for a second believe that Wolverine and Beast would attack each other full-out, claws bared, smashing through the walls of the school, because of that stupid serum. Not for a second. It was so blatantly, "we need a fight scene, who would it be cool to see fighting?" And would any student, anywhere, ever, actually ask a teacher, "Are you a fucking retard?" (And not get the shit kicked out of him.) I guess I'm sticking with this book because I want to believe it could be great, even though it isn't even close yet.