Thursday, December 15, 2005

MUSIC: The AV Club's Top Ten Lists

Or: A Look At Tom's Musical Ignorance

The Onion's AV Club released their 2005: The Year In Music feature this week. And, as always, it frightened and confused me. Who the hell are all these people? And why does everyone seem to know them but me?

I swear I used to know about music. There was a time when no matter how obscure you got, not only did I know of them, I could trump you with an even more obscure name. Therapy?, anybody? How about some Pegboy? Or try some Whirling Dervishes on for size. See? There was a time when I knew this stuff. And that time was called "college." It's long gone.

Eight critics each picked their top ten albums of the year. Of the 61* different albums they named, here is how they break down in terms of my knowledge of them. It's very sad. Play along with me, and feel superior!

Never Heard Of Them

Andrew Bird, The Mysterious Production Of Eggs
Animal Collective, Feels
Antony And The Johnsons, I Am A Bird Now
Atmosphere, You Can't Imagine How Much Fun We're Having
Big Pooh, Sleepers
Bloc Party, Silent Alarm
Boom Bap Project, Reprogram
Bright Eyes, I'm Wide Awake It's Morning
Broken Social Scene, Broken Social Scene
Chad VanGaalen, Infiniheart
Clem Snide, End Of Love
Common, Be
Constantines, Tournament Of Hearts
Criteria, When We Break
Crooked Fingers, Dignity And Shame
Danger Doom, The Mouse And The Mask
The Deadly Snakes, Porcella
Dominik Eulberg, Kreucht & Fleucht
Edan, Beauty And The Beat
Four Tet, Everything Ecstatic
The Go! Team, Thunder, Lightning, Strike
The Hold Steady, Separation Sunday
Iron & Wine and Calexico, In The Reins
Jamie Lidell, Multiply
Kings Of Leon, Aha Shake Heartbreak
Konono No. 1, Congotronics
Latterman, No Matter Where We Go...!
LCD Soundsystem, LCD Soundsystem
Little Brother, The Minstrel Show
Maria Taylor, 11:11
Matias Aguayo, Are You Really Lost
Maxïmo Park, A Certain Trigger
My Morning Jacket, Z
The National, Alligator
Out Hud, Let Us Never Speak Of It Again
The Perceptionists, The Perceptionists
Quasimoto, The Further Adventures Of Lord Quas
Rogue Wave, Descended Like Vultures
Sarah Lee Guthrie & Johnny Irion, Exploration (well, I've heard of the name "Guthrie," but not this Guthrie)
Sun Kil Moon, Tiny Cities
Supersystem, Always Never Again
Troubled Hubble, Making Beds In A Burning House
Zion I, True & Livin'

Heard Of, But Never Heard Their Music

The Decemberists, Picaresque
Low, The Great Destroyer
The New Pornographers, Twin Cinema
Sigur Ros, Takk...
Sufjan Stevens, Illinois

Heard Of, And Heard Some Of Their Music

Bob Dylan, No Direction Home: The Soundtrack
Bob Mould, Body Of Song
Coldplay, X&Y
Death Cab For Cutie, Plans
Eels, Blinking Lights And Other Revelations
Fiona Apple, Extraordinary Machine
Gwen Stefani, Love. Angel. Music. Baby.
Kanye West, Late Registration
Ryan Adams & The Cardinals, Cold Roses
Sleater-Kinney, The Woods
The White Stripes, Get Behind Me Satan

Heard Of, And Own The Actual Album

Foo Fighters, In Your Honor

Albums I'm Buying For My Mom For Christmas

Neil Diamond, 12 Songs

*This used to say 60 different albums, which only further indicates my ignorance. I had one line that said:

Animal Collective, Feels Out Hud, Let Us Never Speak Of It Again

That was my screw-up when formatting this post. It should actually be two different items:

Animal Collective, Feels
Out Hud, Let Us Never Speak Of It Again

The fact I didn't notice anything wrong just proves how clueless I am. To some people, I'm sure that's as obvious a gaffe as if I had said, "I really love that album, Quadrophenia, by that group The Beatles Let It Be The Who."

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