MUSIC: Spin's 100 Greatest Albums, 1985-2005

Shamelessly stolen from Delenda Est Carthago*, I'm taking a look at Spin Magazine's 100 Greatest Albums of the past 20 years (which is how long Spin has been in existence). Let's see which ones I own (or used to own), which ones I should own, and which ones Spin's got its head up its ass over (which is probably a lot, since, after all, it is Spin).

1. Radiohead - OK Computer (1997). These guys were #1 on my list, too... of things I don't get. As in, I don't get why anybody would listen to them at all, let alone claim that they made the greatest album of the past 20 years. God, they're boring. Boring!
   
2. Public Enemy - It Takes a Nation of Millions to Hold Us Back (1988). From the era when I actually listened to rap music (via my college roommates). Through repeated, involuntary listenings, I eventually opened up and grew to appreciate a number of rap artists, with these guys right at the top. This is a brilliant album, but strangely, I've never owned it myself. The only P.E. I own right now is Apocalypse '91: The Enemy Strikes Black, which is also great, but not quite in the same groundbreaking league.
   
3. Nirvana - Nevermind (1991). Of course I own it, and of course it's great. I don't quite worship them the way others of my approximate generation did (and still do), and I'm actually a little surprised that the Foo Fighters (whom I like much better than Nirvana) didn't make the list, but I can't deny this was a landmark record.
   
4. Pavement - Slanted and Enchanted (1992). Never liked 'em. My buddy Matt loved these guys, and tried to convert me; didn't work. I'd rather listen to Quint scraping the blackboard with his fingernails in Jaws on an hour-long loop than to ever hear a song off this album again.
   
5. The Smiths - The Queen is Dead (1986). What a whiny bastard Morrissey is.
   
6. Pixies - Surfer Rosa (1988). The only album of theirs I've ever owned. I was never a big fan, but this one grew on me. Plus there's a topless gal on the cover. Tee hee!
   
7. De La Soul - 3 Feet High and Rising (1989). This was one of the hip hop artists that did not win me over back in college. I always almost kind of maybe sort of a little bit liked them, but never quite became a fan.
   
8. Prince - Sign O' the Times (1987). I had to look up this album on Amazon to see which songs I'd recognize from it, and the answer is: none. Huh.
   
9. PJ Harvey - Rid of Me (1993). Don't care for her. No sir.
   
10. N.W.A. - Straight Outta Compton (1988). "Straight outta Compton! Crazy motherfucker named Ice Cube!" Yeah, this album is sweet.
    
11. U2 - Achtung Baby (1991). I can take or leave U2. This album's okay, I guess, but I've never owned it, and likely never will.
    
12. Beastie Boys - Paul's Boutique (1989). Owned it, didn't love it as much as everyone else did, but I liked it all right.
    
13. Hüsker Dü - New Day Rising (1985). Never got into this album. I liked Zen Arcade, which came out one year too early to qualify for this list.
    
14. Sonic Youth - Daydream Nation (1988). Hate these guys. I just don't get their popularity: why would you want to listen to horrible vocals and distortion?
    
15. Liz Phair - Exile in Guyville (1993). Lot of great stuff here, if a little uneven. And hey, how many other women singers put topless pictures of themselves in their liner notes? (No, seriously, how many?)
    
16. Beck - Odelay (1996). Never owned a Beck album. I should really break down and get this one.
    
17. Nas - Illmatic (1994). Nas? Nah!
    
18. Guns N' Roses - Appetite for Destruction (1987). I played this album about 23,000 times in my Freshman year of college. I can still rock out to it every once in a while. They imploded in an ugly way, but they were great while they lasted.
    
19. Hole - Live Through This (1994). I actually prefer the studio polish of Celebrity Skin -- especially the way it takes the raw, grating edge out of Courtney Love's vocals -- but this one's got some good stuff.
    
20. Wu-Tang Clan - Enter the Wu-Tang (36 Chambers) (1993). I feel like I could like these guys if I listened to them more, but I don't feel like listening to more. So there.
    
21. Public Enemy - Fear of a Black Planet (1990). Another great album. I think I might actually still own this on vinyl, somewhere.
    
22. My Bloody Valentine - Loveless (1991). Who?
    
23. Outkast - Stankonia (2000). I think I've heard exactly one song by Outkast (you can probably guess which one), and while I liked it, I suspect I wouldn't like much else by them.
    
24. Sleater-Kinney - Dig Me Out (1997). I did own this album, but didn't listen to it much. I've tried to appreciate this group, but the lead vocals have such a piercing, wailing, yodeling quality to them... I can't get past that.
    
25. Nine Inch Nails - The Downward Spiral (1994). Not a fan. Does this album have "Closer"? I like that one song. That's it.
    
26. Björk - Post (1995). I like a couple of her songs, but I can't imagine listening to a whole album.
    
27. The Cure - The Head on the Door (1985). Interesting choice. I'd have expected Disintegration instead. Frankly, my favorite is Kiss Me, Kiss Me, Kiss Me.
    
28. Oasis - Definitely Maybe (1994). Is this the one with "Wonderwall" and "Champagne Supernova"? No? Then I didn't like this album.
    
29. Fugazi - 13 Songs (1989). I've never really given these guys a chance. I think I might like them. Maybe one day I'll find out.
    
30. The Notorious B.I.G. - Ready to Die (1994). Never liked him, and liked him even less once Puff Daddy co-opted his death.
    
31. Dinosaur Jr. - You're Living All Over Me (1987). Hate these guys. Put 'em up there with Sonic Youth and Pavement in the category, "Groups everyone but Tom liked in college."
    
32. The Replacements - Tim (1985). MATS!! Actually, I don't care for them all that much. This is the one album of theirs I'd consider owning. "Bastards of Young" is genius, and "Waitress in the Sky" is a delightfully poisonous song.
    
33. Ice Cube - AmeriKKKa's Most Wanted (1990). I liked this album at one time, but now I couldn't tell you one thing about it. I'm not very gangsta, yo.
    
34. Elliot Smith - Either/Or (1997). How 'bout neither?
    
35. Dr. Dre - The Chronic (1992). This is some good shit right here.
    
36. Pixies - Doolittle (1989). It ain't Surfer Rosa, so I didn't like it much.
    
37. Guided By Voices - Bee Thousand (1994). No clue who or what this is. I might recognize a song if you played it for me, but really, why bother?
    
38. A Tribe Called Quest - The Low End Theory (1991). Same as with De La Soul -- almost but not quite liked them.
    
39. Lucinda Williams - Lucinda Williams (1988). I should get some Lucinda Williams. Right now!! (Okay, maybe later.)
    
40. Run-D.M.C. - Raising Hell (1986). Rap I actually listened to before college! Whoa. Never owned it, but liked it a lot.
    
41. Smashing Pumpkins - Siamese Dream (1993). This was great stuff.
    
42. Jane's Addiction - Nothing's Shocking (1988). The only Jane's album I ever liked. I don't own this anymore, but I should.
    
43. Boogie Down Productions - Criminal Minded (1987). You got me floating on this one.
    
44. Green Day - Dookie (1994). My favorite album on this list so far.
    
45. Kanye West - College Dropout (2004). I've heard a couple songs, and he's good, but he's so overhyped (see #49 below), I just can't buy into him.
    
46. The Fall - The Nation's Saving Grace (1985). If I looked this up, it might ring some bells, but I really can't be bothered.
    
47. Eric B. & Rakim - Paid in Full (1987). Nope.
    
48. Radiohead - Kid A (2000). See #1.
    
49. Lauryn Hill - The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill (1998). Speaking of overhyped... Jesus, you'd think this album could cure cancer, the way people went on and on about it when it came out. I never thought it was any better than mediocre.
    
50. New Order - Low-Life (1985). Not a big New Order fan. Too depressing even for me.
    
    As your reward for making it to the halfway point, here is your picture of Misty May's ass (which has once again been popping up in the most common search terms used to find my site).
    
    
    You're welcome.
    
    
51. Nirvana - In Utero (1993). Own it. Uneven, but the highs are very, very good.
    
52. Beastie Boys - Licensed to Ill (1986). I don't think I've ever heard this album straight through. This is another one I should get.
    
53. Rage Against the Machine - The Battle of Los Angeles (1999). Was this better than their first album? That one was great; their second one made me not want to get this third one.
    
54. The Breeders - Last Splash (1993). I loved "Cannonball," but didn't much care for the rest of this album. The whole Pixies-Breeders-Belly axis of music never really caught on with me.
    
55. The Chemical Brothers - Dig Your Own Hole (1997). Techno? Tech hell no. (I predict that line will become as immortal as NewsRadio's "Internet? Internot.")
    
56. PJ Harvey - To Bring You My Love (1995). Again with the PJ Harvey!
    
57. The White Stripes - White Blood Cells (2001). I've enjoyed what I've heard of the White Stripes, but I've never gotten an album. I probably should. I just have an unnatural fear of a band which consists only of one guitar and a drum kit.
    
58. Metallica - Master of Puppets (1986). I would've gone with ...And Justice For All, but this is also an excellent, head-banging selection.
    
59. Modest Mouse - The Lonesome Crowded West (1997). They bore me almost as much as Radiohead.
    
60. De La Soul - De La Soul is Dead (1991). Again with the De La Soul!
    
61. Weezer - Pinkerton (1996). This is the album of theirs I'm least inclined to purchase. Perhaps I should reconsider. I like their other stuff well enough.
    
62. Missy Elliott - Supa Dupa Fly (1997). I liked that one song she did. You know, that one song? Where she does the thing? And says that other thing? Yeah, that one. I have no idea what I'm talking about. I don't care for her.
    
63. Pavement - Crooked Rain, Crooked Rain (1994). Again with the Pavement!
    
64. Eminem - The Marshall Mathers LP (2000). Never owned it, but I could see myself getting it.
    
65. Basement Jaxx - Remedy (1999). No idea.
    
66. Outkast - Aquemini (1998). Again with the "again with the" joke!
    
67. Slayer - Reign in Blood (1986). Slayer??
    
68. Tricky - Maxiquaye (1995). Nope.
    
69. DJ Shadow - Entroducing DJ Shadow (1996). Uh-uh.
    
70. Jay-Z - The Blueprint (2001). Negatory.
    
71. The Jesus and Mary Chain - Psychocandy (1985). My best friend from college was a huge fan of JMC. Me, not so much.
    
72. Raekwon - Only Built 4 Cuban Linx (1995). Who? Is that a person's name?
    
73. Pulp - Different Class (1995). Don't think so.
    
74. Portishead - Dummy (1994). Nein.
    
75. Le Tigre - Le Tigre (1999). Nyet.
    
76. Belle and Sebastian - If You're Feeling Sinister (1997). Pass.
    
77. Wilco - Yankee Hotel Foxtrot (2002). Never owned an album, but I think I'd like them.
    
78. The Stone Roses - The Stone Roses (1989). Don't see the appeal.
    
79. Moby - Everything is Wrong (1995). I'd prefer not.
    
80. D'Angelo - Voodoo (2000). Isn't this the guy who had that video where you could almost see his wing-wang? Whatever happened to this guy?
    
81. Beck - Mellow Gold (1994). Ah, we finally get back to an artist I don't feel overwhelmingly negative or utterly indifferent to. That was a long cold stretch there. I don't have this album... but I could.
    
82. Jeff Buckley - Grace (1994). Heard nothing but good things about this fella, and this album. Not interested.
    
83. At the Drive-In - Relationship of Command (2000). My buddy Matt (again) loved this album, but it didn't do much for me. Really, probably 90% of the music Matt likes, I don't, and vice-versa. I don't know why I thought that was relevant.
    
84. Soundgarden - Superunknown (1994). I love this album.
    
85. R.E.M. - Automatic for the People (1992). I listened to this album a hundred times on my vacation in Spain, and I still have to say, it's one of my less favorite R.E.M. albums. I'd have put Green or Out of Time here instead.
    
86. Meat Puppets - Up on the Sun (1985). I don't think I've ever heard anything by these guys. I'd say it's about 50/50 that I'd either really, really like them, or completely hate them.
    
87. Blur - Parklife (1994). On the strength of the ass-kicking power of "Song 2" (you know: "Woohoo! Well I feel heavy metal!" Et cetera), I picked up a Blur album, and it was all whiny, weedy, wimpy crap. I guess they were being ironic when they pretended they knew how to make a good rock song.
    
88. Stereolab - Emperor Tomato Ketchup (1996). Is this techno? I'm gonna guess this is techno. (God, could I be any more out of touch? Ah, screw you all! Get off my lawn!!) I'm looking at the album description on Amazon, and I still don't know what the hell it is. I just know it doesn't sound like anything I'd touch with a ten meter cattle prod.
    
89. Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Fever to Tell (2003). This is one of the top 100 albums? These guys had more of a "Flavor of the Month" feel to me, but whatever, it's not like I listened to the whole album. I could see myself giving it a try, though.
    
90. Sonic Youth - Sister (1987). Again with the Sonic Youth!!
    
91. XTC - Skylarking (1986). Great album.
    
92. Big Black - Atomizer (1986). No clue.
    
93. Pearl Jam - Ten (1991). Did not age well, except for "Jeremy," which still kicks ass.
    
94. Slint - Spiderland (1991). Who?
    
95. Elastica - Elastica (1995). Okay, I actually did own this album, and this is just crazy talk. This was nothing special whatsoever.
    
96. The Pogues - Rum, Sodomy and the Lash (1985). My favorite Pogues album by a country mile. This is pure genius from beginning to end.
    
97. Neutral Milk Hotel - In the Aeroplane Over the Sea (1998). Okay, now they're just making up names. Neutral Milk Hotel? I call bullshit on that one! That's not for real!!
    
98. Cornershop - When I Was Born for the 7th Time (1997). Another one of those albums my buddy Matt thought was brilliant and I couldn't stomach. My buddy Matt is apparently 8,000 times hipper than I am.
    
99. Afghan Whigs - Gentlemen (1993). Matt likes these guys, too. I don't.
    
100. The Strokes - This is It (2001). Like the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, I kind of feel like they're more of a fad than a lasting work of genius, but I could probably get into this album if I gave it a try.

Wow, that kind of dragged out, didn't it? And I don't seem to like, or even be aware of, most of the stuff Spin thinks is the be-all and end-all. That's probably why I don't read Spin. Oh, and also because it sucks.

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*Literally, "Seize the day."