Monday, July 10, 2006


I'd like to give you my review of Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest. I'd like to, but it wouldn't be entirely fair, since I fell asleep sometime during the middle 87 hours of it. I mean literally, out cold asleep. Partly this is because I smuggled a six-pack of beer into the theater -- in my belly. (Thank you for that line, Patton Oswalt.) And partly this is because Dead Man's Chest does the same thing the original film did -- it bloats what should've been a tight 90-minute action comedy with an extra hour of redundant CGI. Yes, I can see you spent a lot of money on the fish people. Get over it. It's so filled with computer-generated spectacle that nothing at all seems special. Also, seriously, why not just have Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley switch roles and be done with it?

I'm not ruling out the possibility that I would have enjoyed this movie if I were fully conscious. I'm just not betting on it.

How did none of you let me know about the tryouts for VH1's World Series of Pop Culture? I would have kicked ass on this show. I watched the first episode tonight, and it's an entertaining game. Nice presentation, good questions, a decent mix of easy (some of which still stumped a few players) and obscure (maybe some of you would know what song Kate Capshaw sings in Chinese at the beginning of Temple of Doom, but I did not). I'm hooked. And I'm definitely going to get on the next season of this show -- assuming there is one.

Speaking of VH1, why in the hell is there going to be a second season of Flavor of Love? Are you telling me Flavor Flav didn't find true love in season one???

How come before today I had never heard of Corinne Bailey Rae, and now all of a sudden I can't stop hearing about her? What's with the media blitz? I've never heard one of her songs and already I'm sick of her. Apparently she's the next Norah Jones. Which reminds me: whatever happened to Norah Jones?

The song was "Anything Goes."

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